So, I have to get a dress for Matt’s brother’s wedding in August. It’s Black Tie, and I don’t really have anything suitable, although the red dress pictured would do at a pinch.

I have had troubles in the past with allowing myself to look nice, feminine etc. Pretty well over that. But my style is funky, cute, unusual, when I dress up. For example, when I went to the pub the other night, skirt made of Hawaiian shirt material, flat pumps, well we all know my peculiar skirt collection.

What I don’t like is this stuff. Having to pay out a LOT of money for something pretty conservative and black-tie-y that I’m only going to wear once or twice. I just don’t “do” dressed up. I don’t like dressing up in that way. And I resent the money. If I had £100-£150 spare I’d buy Persephone books, get some new trainers, give some away…

We marched round a few shops today as I’d been complaining there is mostly smocks or wrapover cleavagey things around. Debenhams had a fair range of party dresses and so did Monsoon. But nothing I loved for £100. And I just feel uncomfortable getting and wearing this stuff. So I basically wept my way round Birmingham, had a cry on the bus and one when I got home.

It’s too pressured. It has to please me, Matt and not embarass him in front of his family. I’d be tempted to get a very cool black suit and white top and go in black tie myself. No way.

So I think it’s TKMaxx and Bicester shopping village. Anywhere else in the Midlands?? I resent the time spent too, you know.

Argh!

Feel better now… a bit better… thank you for listening to the rant…